need a tooth brush?

today i found these gems on my mac. considering i'm still macbook illiterate, they were the best surprise.

i less than three T.R.

we're those people who run marathons.

morning of, getting ready to go. have i mentioned how i love these individuals more than anything in this world? have i mentioned how incredibly proud i am of all of us?

because i do. and i am.

run to be.

after hundreds of training miles, two pairs of shoes, mysteriously bleeding feet, protein shakes at 2 am and many naysayers, I DID IT.

the nike women's half marathon was a success and hands down the experience of my life. 'finish line feeling' is the undoubtedly the best drug i've experienced and happy tears were more than welcome as was receiving a tiffany's necklace from a sexy fire fighter and downing a bagel in thirty seconds.

an open letter to a broken heart:

because you are my baby cousin and you are hurting and I love you. and I meant every word when I said I want to kick his ass but realistically, there are so many better ways to spend our (your) time and energy.

-Do something you love, something for you. it's cheesy but now's the time to rediscover yourself. remember how you used to love running? run! remember how you've been pretending to like lame comedy/sports movies for him? see a chick flick! see a documentary! see anything with an intelligence level beyond fart jokes and 30-year-old men hung over in Vegas.

-Cry. make a playlist of all your "songs" or songs that are sad or remind you of him and listen to it. listen and cry and be mad and frustrated and angry. it's okay and you'll feel so much better.

-but also, listen to "Breaking Up" by Rilo Kiley and "Fuck You" by Cee-Lo. scream and dance and let it out. your celebration (that's right, this is the best thing to ever happen to you) begins now.

-Find your Parisians, find your David Campbell. and use them. don't use them, but use them. your friends are your biggest allies, your closest confidants and I promise they don't really mind when you ask them for help. they'll be there at midnight when you're lonely and just want to talk and they'll be there to take you on long car drives when you don't feel like talking at all.

-Get hott(er). seriously, what better excuse to get a makeover or go shopping. buy those sexy heels you've been lusting over, buy a new lip gloss just because.

-Ignore the haters. it's true that haters are going hate. mutual friends you thought were your friends may not be. people take sides and people gossip, that's life. ignore it. rise above it. don't stoop to that level, keep your head up and don't always verbalize what you're thinking/feeling. you're so much better than him anyway.

-Pack it up. there's probably stuff all over that reminds you of him. gifts, cards, pictures. don't toss it or burn it, you'll want to look back years from now and laugh at that douche ex boyfriend (also, some memories will always be sweet so don't be bitter) so pack it in a box and put it somewhere you can't see it. fill picture frames with inspirational quotes, pictures of you and your friends and of course, your favorite older cousin.

-Channel your energy. it's so easy to be pissed off but use that energy for something good. never be bitter, never get jaded. and this might be a little redundant but get off the couch you guys sat on every friday night watching the cartoon network and go to the football games, hang out with your friends, volunteer, save that money you spent for fucking taco Tuesday (you don't even like fast food!) and spend it how you want to spend it.

-Embrace this. you're a senior in high school for gosh's sakes! these next few months, this coming year is going to be the best time of your life. you don't have time for petty boys, you need a man who will take care you, stand by you and appreciate you. but don't rush it. savor your independence. nothing good ever fell into someone's lap. work hard in school, be a good person and that man will come to you on his own.

and just think: months from now, it won't hurt anymore. there are so many better looking guys to make out with, go on dates with and have fun with. five years from now, you'll barely remember his name. ten years from now, you'll see him at a high school reunion. he'll be fat and bald and alone. you'll still be fucking gorgeous, you'll be successful, and you'll have someone much better to show off.

but really, you are my baby cousin and I love you and would do anything for you so if you really want me to kick his ass, then only say the word, text me an address, promise to somehow bail me out of jail, and I'm there.

"All I ask of you is one thing: please don't be cynical. I hate cynicism - it's my least favorite quality and it doesn't lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen." -Conan O'Brein.

that one time i was mistaken for a lesbian.

this is too good to pass up.

so i'm currently attempting to get someone to take over the lease on my apartment because i'm moving on to bigger and better things (ie. gypsy house, stay tuned for details). i posted an ad on craigslist with the information and this exchange student from the UK replies almost immediately.

i tell her i can send pictures later if she's interested. my intent was pictures of the apartment. she took this as me hitting on her and wrote "thanks aubrey, i appreciate your candor" and went on to explain that she's single, straight but also gay friendly. and then she signed it with, "p.s. i have all the pics i need."

biggest fail.

this one's up there with the great 2008 rejection letter incident from UC Merced when i didn't even apply. my life is a sitcom.

come on alex, you can do it!

1. Arcade Fire on stage. Campanile in the background.

2. More on stage time.

3. On the Golden Gate! Helpline for possible jumpers. (my perceptions of The Bridge came to life)

4. View of the pillar. It was super cold and drizzly and there was a breast cancer awareness marathon going on.

This weekend involved a quick turn around trip to Berkeley for the Arcade Fire concert. In between a whole bunch of awkwardness, we squeezed in a journey to San Fran complete with obligatory tourist destinations and tons of walking. Spent some time with the Berkelian Parisians, caught a movie and festivities with Best Friend, and saw AF Sunday night. They are arguably the best live band. I would have loved to have been in the pit with all the standing people but you know, awkwardness. AND THEN we drove all the way back, arriving in Inland Empire at 5am, in time for class Monday morning. But of course I fell asleep at 7am, woke up at almost 1 with a class and an unfinished paper due at 2. But boy can I write under pressure!

that one time i woke up looking strangely like...rihanna.

Not to make light of a very serious incident but the other day I woke up looking like Rihanna circa February 2009 post-Chris Brown beating. Unfortunately and thankfully the picture does not show the full extent of my ugly swollen puffiness but it's just one of my many tragic bodily functions (bleeding feet, night eating, you know): every so often I wake up with an allergic reaction. This time I think Nyquil is to blame. Used as a cure for colds or for insomnia, if I really am allergic to Nyquil, the world of Aubrey will get just a little bit sadder.

confessions of a closeted smoker.

Meet my friend Blake*. He is an obsessive, addicted smoker of marlboro reds. He has somehow managed to hide this fact from his poor unsuspecting parents for the past three years.

To avoid being caught with the scent of cigarette on his hand, he often wears a glove (see below picture).

(Note the gold watch over the glove. Always classy.) He wears this while we are in public and it's really creepy and it's really embarrassing.

When not in public, he often comes over to my house and wraps his fingers in plastic with painting tape. And I wonder why I'm his friend every day...

*name has been changed to protect the innocent, though if you're reading this you're most likely my close friend and most likely know exactly who is photographed.

what scares me most.

i was asked what i was most afraid of in a job interview the other day. WHAT THE WHAT?! i offered some lame answer about the economy and global warming, whatever came to mind superficially. but really, i am most afraid of the moment in time where i look at a picture from high school or college or early adulthood and don't remember. when i have to scan my brain to put a name to the face, "OH! that's her. we were really good friends in high school."

gentleman, good night. ladies...good morning.

songs i listen to that get me ridiculously pumped up to begin/endure running many miles:

1. frontin' - pharrell williams (stuck in 2002 obviously, but this is my current favorite song. i usually begin with this, the rest are no particular order)

2. bowl of oranges- bright eyes

3. american boy- estelle f. kanye

4. new york- jayz f. alisha keys

5. photobooth- friendly fires

6. no you girls- franz ferdinand

7. animal- miike snow

8. big pimpin- jayz

9. senorita- justin timberlake

10. wake up- arcade fire

11. the big guns- jenny lewis f. watson twins

12. daft punk is playing at my house- lcd soundsystem

13. going up the country- canned heat

14. the skin of my yellow country teeth- clap your hands say yeah

15. knife- girl talk's remix of grizzly bear

p.s. tomorrow is september, then it'll be october and then october 18 and that's when i run the real deal. crap.